I've a good friend who definitely matches the definition of AFC. In his twenties, he is still a virgin, after kissed a girl (one of his proudest stories), and constantly yells about how girls"always opt for the douchebags who do not take care of them". However, by far and away the largest thing that marks him out as an AFC to me personally is the fact that he feels constantly compelled to shield women in conditions where they aren't receiving any insult or threat. We predict the need to'shield' girls white knight syndrome, and sadly, I tend to meet a lot of white knights.
When I flirt, I have a tendency to keep my conversations hard for both parties; being jokingly insulting in equal amount. This, one evening, saw me call a woman a"drunk bitch" because she dropped over and slurred her words (this kind of language was by no way different from the way her and me talked to each other). My buddy, misguided as he was, felt forced to stand up and say to all in the area"Now [my title ]! That is a very rude thing to say for her" . Everyone went silent and looked at him for an instant, until the girl on the floor thankfully broke the silence instead beautifully by screaming"Yeah [my title ] don't be a whore!" . Normality restored. Following the party I took my friend aside and explained to him what he was doing wrong and why it made girls think he was weird. So here's a short version of the white knight talk.
1.
It's Sexist
Our ideas of knighthood and chivalry derive in the era where guys were infinitely stronger than girls, and thus chivalry encouraged men to assist those who weren't in charge of their own lives. By jumping into defend a lady's'honor' now (particularly without requesting her), you're making the assumption that she can't help herself. Let her call out a man if he's being a dickhead. It is Creepy
Would you know who the two biggest groups of people of the world who concerned with women's honor are? The very spiritual, and the'nice guys'. Incidentally neither of these groups get a lot of action out of wedlock. By obsessing on the reputation or battles (perceived or real) of a woman who is not your friend or lover, you are showing an extremely suggestive interest in her. Be a person and show your interest .
3.
It Is Your Problem
If you're bravely jumping to the assistance of some damsel, you almost definitely have not stopped to think about if she discovers it to be a problem. To intervene is to enforce your self on her, as you do not know if she finds what was stated offensive. In fact all it really does is tell everyone that you are uncomfortable with the term'bitch' (for example).
In this postmodern, cynical age, no one stands up and straight up calls folks out on their flaws facing others. If you're a PUA worth anything, then you will at some point have had to fend of men on behalf of women you're out clubbing with. Unless you are an idiot, then you don't do so by standing up and stating to the interloper"Look guy, your presence is making this lady feel uneasy and she is not interested in you." Even if you're right in saying something like that, you can certainly do it with much more class and much more subtlety. For instance (going back to the my white knight encounter ) you can simply say within the shoulder Home page something along the lines of"Can you kiss your mother with that mouth?" Then move the dialogue on. Attempt to be slick guys.
Things to do
These 3 mindset changes should enable you to steer clear of white knight behaviour. Like the Player
Among the first things you need to do is to hear what men say to girls and try to figure out if it's a misguided attempt at being emotional genius. Even if it is against your friend or partner, excellent game is good match, and you'll be able to learn a great deal from observing prior to acting. If a man says something that amuses your inner white knight, pause. The very first thing you should do is to give him respect for attempting to say something that risks a negative reaction. That is something that the vast majority of the societal cattle around you'll never attempt in their lifetime. Be Edgy Practice adding a bit of spice into your conversations: all you have to do is ask why somebody believes something, or disagree with them on a minor point, that is usually sufficient to generate a tiny pleasurable friction. Come to enjoy this look on a woman's face when she's snapped out of automatic conversation mode because you didn't stick to the standard pattern of polite agreement. A conversation is much nicer when both parties have to consider what they are saying.
3.
Like the Girls
Ultimately you have to realize that girls are (deservedly) in charge of their lives, and that it has taken a long time to get there. This is the best thing that could have occurred to the relationship game, as it make guys just like you and I become better people so that we're appealing to women (instead of back in the day when women were regarded as discussing real estate, you didn't need to be a terrific man back then). You need to play by these rules and accept that it is up to the woman whether to be offended or not, and to decide if your aid is necessary. Focus on your personal game friend.